U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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