We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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