11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
