Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
