Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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