WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
You need a sexual gate keeper
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
