i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Randomize
