But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
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