waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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