i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
