I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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