if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
