names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Randomize
