My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
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