WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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