It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
