How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
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