am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize