I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize