yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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