Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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