Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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