I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Randomize
