You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
