just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
