glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
im holly from the hills drunk
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Randomize
