it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
