stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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