We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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