I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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