JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
