Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
