i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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