Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Randomize