Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
