I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
