If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
