I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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