I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
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