Someone shit on the floor
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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