just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
