oh god the rape fog is back!
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
