So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
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