So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
