i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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