She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
