Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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