Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Dick very happy bro
Randomize
