who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
