I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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