your room smells of hookers.
And success
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize